solange knowles At Jamie Foxx's album release party at Miami's Karu&Y

Poor Solange cross-weaved her own horrible, horrible kicks. Remember those odd little key chains we made as seven-year-olds? I had a hot pink ‘n’ lime green one, courtesy of my after-school life at the Boys & Girls Club. I gave it to a boy.

At Jamie Foxx's album release party at Miami's Karu&Y

Who’s not shutting it down, but rather, stompin’ it up like she’s Chewbacca on the run is Rachel Zoe. Lord, her wedges are bigger than her stomach!rachelzoe Shopping on Robertson Blvd. in L.A

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sally hawkins At A the 2008 New York Film Critic's Circle Awards

It’s kind of sweet that the dress doesn’t move, like, at all. But it could afford to lose some length — and lose the Mrs. Hogenson (à la The Incredibles) doppelganger thang.

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Anne HathawayAt,Kate Hudson at the N.Y. premiere of Bride Wars

Anne HathawayAt,Kate Hudson at the N.Y. premiere of Bride Wars
It’s a movie called Bride Wars, so of course the competitive warring between , and Anne Hathaway is still alive. Anne could’ve taken this — easily — had she not gone all Sigourney Weaver HAR-HAR-HAR MAN at her premiere. Kate would obviously do something “bridal” but with a dose of Maniac — see the cupcake wrapper around her waist. Anne, WTF? Where’s the hot-ass couture you’ve been sporting since you and the Italian sleaze parted ways? This makes me feel like I know how the movie ends …

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Kate Hudson At Theater for The David Letterman Show

Outside N.Y.'s Ed Sullivan Theater for The David Letterman ShowMy God, from behind, she looks more and more like Goldie Hawn every day. There’s something about the pushed-together thighs, right?

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Dakota Fanning At the 2009 Palm Springs International Film Festival Awards gala

Selena, Miley — everyone. I think she’s got it. Puberty. Dakota Fanning found it! It’s the beginning …She’s handling this transition phase very, very well. She’s chosen a supercute little dress with cleavage-enhancing “illusion” — thank you, ruffles and extra seams! A-plus on the not-so-high heels (protective-prone fashion bitches would cut a girl for “moving too fast”). And boys … she’s shaved her legs!

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Suzanne Somers, Emulate a Gossip Girl

Another thing, S.S., there’s only one S (literally, just “S”) that can pull off a bright-colored bubble skirt the size of the Gulf of Mexico, and that’s Serena Van Der Woodsen. And it’s because she’s a (fictional) teenager in a (fictional) fashion show. S.S., you’re 62. And you’ve paired the big-ass thing with some track jacket from Patagonia.

[At the 2009 Palm Springs International Film Festival Awards gala]

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